“I don’t think I’m wrong. But just because I’m not wrong doesn’t mean that Chris is wrong.”
Lulu Pencil’s tale in ChocoPro took an unexpected and difficult turn when she ran headlong into Chris Brookes and put her beloved pink cap on the line. She fought tooth and nail through the resulting bitter feud and journey of self identity until she finally reclaimed her cap not by beating Chris, but by earning just enough of his respect for him to choose to give it back.
In their big I Quit tag match at ChocoPro 63, Lulu refused to give up as Chris tortured her and only lost because Emi Pencil (Emi Sakura’s Lulu-like “persona” she adopts when teaming with Lulu) finally became a truly selfless partner and quit herself to prevent more pain for Lulu. The fact that Lulu never gave up was enough for Chris, who shoved her hat under her hand as she lay exhausted after the match.
(See Lulu’s Hat: A Tale of a Pencil’s Pride for a larger, in depth examination of the above events.)
Lulu was whole, and her long war with Chris apparently over. But of course her larger story would continue…
Expanded Pencil Army
Chris wasn’t the only person whose respect Lulu would earn. Minoru Fujita, a deathmatch legend, has become a mainstay in ChocoPro and is currently the reigning Super Asia champion. But even before he won that particular title, he made a completely unexpected choice.
On ChocoPro 72 then reigning BJW Deathmatch Champion Fujita faced Lulu in a singles match. In a stark contrast to the match with Chris that started everything back on ChocoPro 44, Fujita insisted on putting his title on the line (unofficially at least). So Lulu faced Fujita on his terms: deathmatch style with all manner of weapons involved.
She put her heart into the match and as always fought in her own unusual style, using all manner of items she could get her hands on in wonderfully weird ways that forced Fujita to adjust and up the intensity. He prevailed of course, and Lulu being Lulu he did so by causing her to trip on a bunch of marbles he threw under her feet, but the quirky writer turned wrestler had left her mark. On ChocoPro 77 Fujita surprised everyone by coming out for his match teaming with Lulu against Best Bros in overalls. Mino Pencil was born and the Pencil Army had grown stronger.
It became official after his match with Emi Sakura on ChocoPro 78 where the two of them battled each other to exhaustion and an inconclusive double pin, then bonded over their shared … well, leader.
On ChocoPro 82 the full Pencil Army (Lulu, Emi, & Mino) united as a trio for the first time facing Best Bros & Yuna. The match was an excellent, intense affair. And Mino Pencil brought a chaotic energy to the group that elevated them beyond what they previously were.
But of course, they weren’t any more successful a team as a whole or in these other iterations than the original Pencil Army. But veterans like Fujita and Sakura believing in Lulu was clearly helping her progress, ever so slowly, towards unlocking more of her potential match by match.
The Unthinkable
At ChocoPro 95, four months and 32 episodes after Lulu was given her hat back after the tag team I Quit match, Chris and Lulu crossed paths once more. Chris teamed with Chie Koishikawa to face the new version of the Pencil Army, Lulu & Mino.
Chris & Chie prevailed in a great match, but that wasn’t the story. After the match things took an unbelievable turn when Lulu reached up from the mat and put her formerly reclaimed hat back in Chris’ hand.
“Do you understand why I gave you my hat back? Do you know what my hat means?”
“I do understand. What do you want from me? You said before you wanted me to make you stronger, and I did that. I did it by lying to you, admittedly. And I betrayed you. And I made you angry. And I took your hat. And because of that, you got strong. What more do you want from me eh? I did everything I could for you why are you giving me your hat? Leave me alone.”
“Yeah. You made me strong. It means you are Pencil Army.”
It took a lot of convincing to the person who says there’s nowhere he belongs in ChocoPro. But Lulu talked about how she knows why Chris came to Japan, how Pencil Army loves wrestling, and how they share the same passion. Her words reached him, and Chris reluctantly put on the cap. Chris Brookes joined the Pencil Army and the whole world was upside down.
Little Brother
Chris Pencil would have his first match as part of the Pencil Army on Day 1 of the big ChocoPro 100 festivities, teaming with Lulu against Black Comaneci (Antonio Honda & Tokiko Kirihara). He showed up as committed as he could be, wearing matching pink overalls with Lulu and the vaunted cap that they had once fought over.
Chris countered Black Comaneci’s dastardly antics with some of his own, with Lulu firmly along for the ride. They acted like real partners, but the more frequent team was a little too much for them and Honda eventually pinned an isolated Lulu with a small package. “Almost Lulu, almost. Next time.”
Despite the loss Lulu tried to do her best to be a proper leader for who she called the “Little Brother” of Pencil Army, including mending his overalls herself in between matches.
The duo gave it another go at ChocoPro 106, against even tougher, more experienced, more brutal competition in the form of Melt Brain Dancing (Psycho & Chango). After another hard fought loss, with Chango making Lulu submit to a vicious torture rack, Chris was not as understanding as he was the first time.
“I never lose in Ichigaya. I win. (…) Next time you call me to be in Pencil Amy, be ready to win.”
The next time would be the biggest challenge yet: the full Pencil Army in an 8 person tag against Best Bros (Mei Suruga & Baliyan Akki) & Egg Tart (Hagane Shinno & Chie Koishikawa) at ChocoPro 110. But at full strength, and with Chris’ stern words as motivation, Lulu was determined to lead the four to their first victory.
And they fought for everything they were worth. But in the end, Chie caught Lulu in the stretch muffler as her partners held the rest of the Pencil Army back.
Lulu tapped, and it all went to hell.
Sakura tried to console the group afterwards and told Chris they were just starting. “Baby steps.” Chris was having none of it.
“You lost. You lost, again. And you didn’t just lose Lulu. After everything we went through together (…) where you didn’t give up. (…) I stupidly thought that there was something in you. I thought there was something more to you than a stupid joke. After all that, today not only did we lose, we lose because you quit. Do you have any idea how insulted I feel right now?”
That was the last straw for Chris, and it was always intended to be. After further verbally laying into Lulu and saying he had enough, he revealed he had brought scissors concealed in his overalls. He cut half the brim off of the prized pink hat he and Lulu had fought over and stormed out, leaving a devastated Pencil Army in his wake.
Renewed Hostilities
To Chris, Lulu was living in a dreamworld. To Sakura and Fujita, what he did to Lulu was unforgivable. A conflicted Lulu felt a measure of brutal truth in Chris’ words about her weaknesses, but believed deep down that she had merit as a wrestler as she was.
She persevered, taping the destroyed hat back together and continuing on in her own way.
Chris was invited to gather two partners of his choice and face the remaining Pencil Army in a 6-person tag.
As with the tag team I Quit match, Chris had no trouble recruiting Yuna Mizumori to his side. Their partner was to be Chris’ close friend Drew Parker, making his “in-ring” ChocoPro debut.
However Drew was injured shortly before the match and it was postponed. In its place ChocoPro 115 ended up being headlined by Chris vs Emi Sakura in a singles contest. Or rather Chris vs Emi PENCIL.
Sakura’s devotion to Lulu and representation of the Emi Pencil persona just enraged Chris even more, and after a brutal twenty minutes of battle he lost all patience and wiped out referee Mei Suruga when she tried to pull him off Sakura. He then pulled off his belt and starting whipping Emi with it, leveling Lulu when she tried to intervene. Yuna stepped in to help Chris when Fujita subsequently attacked, but he ended up laying even her to waste when she tried to prevent him from choking Fujita with the belt. When all was said and done Chris walked out of the chaos with bodies strewn all about the mat behind him, and Mei pulled herself up just long enough to declare the match ChocoPro’s first no contest.
With all the tension overflowing and Drew’s recovery time uncertain, the trios tag was rescheduled for ChocoPro 120 with Chris bringing in Asuka (Veny) in Drew’s place.
The six of them waged war in 40 minutes of pure chaos, but eventually Chris isolated Lulu on what was left of the mat and applied a continually evolving and more vicious version of the very hold Lulu refused to give up in during the I Quit match. She held out as long as she could, with Akki on commentary screaming to her that it was alright and she needed to quit and save herself all the while, but eventually had no choice but to tap and give Chris, Asuka, & Yuna the win.
Chris forced Mei to raise his hand and Akki to announce him as the winner multiple times. ” Everything is as it should be again. The universe is healing. This isn’t a fairy tale. This isn’t a dream. This is real life, and in real life when reality comes to play Chris Brookes wins and Lulu Pencil loses.” He berated Sakura and Fujita about hanging out with Lulu to make themselves feel better.
“Don’t take this as motivation Lulu (…) Take this as a lesson, ok. You don’t belong here. You’re not a professional wrestler. You are a writer. And that’s all you’re ever going to be.”
Emi and Mino stood firm in their support and told Lulu they believe in her. But Lulu was at an impasse. She believed neither her nor Chris were wrong…
Everyone but Emi left without having the traditional post show janken tournament, and Emi said she will keep that chocolate until the day Lulu puts Chris down for a 3 count. The show ended without ChocoPro’s usual smiles as a somber Akki said he finally believes in Lulu Pencil and that someday she’ll give everyone the happy ending they deserved that day.
True Strength
“They’re not supporting you, they’re mocking you.”
One of Chris’ main points of contention about his time in the Pencil Army was the feeling that Sakura and Fujita were not giving Lulu their best.
On the very same night Chris teamed with Lulu as an official Pencil Army member for the first time their stablemates were challenging for the tag tam titles. Fujita & Sakura had defeated Best Bros in non-title competition on ChocoPro 99, SPECIFICALLY wrestling as Emi Sakura & Minoru Fujita and not Emi & Mino Pencil so that Best Bros would be facing their “strongest versions.”
They came up short in the title challenge but once again forwent their alternative Pencil personas in a hellaciously hard hitting affair. The Emi and Mino that show up for Pencil Army matches are completely different in approach and applied abilities than when they compete under other circumstances.
“You’ve got two of the best wrestlers to ever come out of this country in dungarees, dicking around with you pretending you’ve got a chance when all you do every time is screw up and lose.” To Chris, Lulu’s partners weren’t giving her their best efforts.
In Sakura and Fujita’s eyes their Pencil personas aren’t weaker versions per se, it’s that they concentrate on trying to slowly lift Lulu up and not leave her behind. Fujita commented after the six man war that they were fighting as a team. “What if I beat him? It’s nothing. YOU will beat him. And I believe that you will.”
She’ll Just Keep Coming
Things were quiet for a few weeks after the big trios showdown, then it was announced that a singles match between Lulu and Chris was forthcoming at Lulu’s request.
Chris, wanting to be done with it all, said he knew Lulu wouldn’t stop no matter how many times he beat her or tried to talk sense to her. So he wanted to get the next “ten to fifteen gos” out of the way at once. He demanded it be a 30 minute ironman match.
“I promise you, after the ironman match she won’t want to come at me again.”
Lulu’s path went through Chris’ CDK partner, a returning Masahiro Takanashi, on ChocoPro 135. The veteran went quite hard on Lulu, and while she put up a good fight in true Lulu fashion she lost by being unable to release a hold she herself applied and was disqualified on a 5 count after Masa reached the edge of the mat. It was a worrying sign that Lulu had yet to overcome her own failings going into the big showdown with Chris.
Chris had different kind of trial to overcome with one of Lulu’s partners, as he sat down for a ChocoTalk with Emi Sakura the day before the match.
They needled each other a little, but they largely remained civil overall in what was a fascinating, must watch interview about Chris’ side of the journey.
His previously mentioned frustration with the very concept of Emi and Mino Pencil bubbled to the front when discussing the very beginning of things and how Emi had proposed the tag team I Quit match be a handicap match.
“What? Why is two vs one not ok? (Because) You’re supposed to be Emi Sakura. Emi Sakura needs handicap matches?”
“Pencil Army. Emi Pencil.”
“But why are you Emi Pencil?”
“Emi Pencil is very important friend.”
“Emi Pencil is very easy for you.”
Chris also walked through what motivated past choices and actions, but was clear that it was all different now. He felt Lulu’s very continued existence in ChocoPro was a sign that mediocrity was ok.
“She can’t climb any wall. She can’t beat anyone. (…) Everyone’s telling her that she’s doing her best and she’s clearly not.”
“Today, the dream dies.”
Chris put up no pretenses. He came into this match to make sure Lulu never bothered him again. He dominated early on, antagonizing and belittling Lulu at every turn. At one point he used his height and strength to press her against the ceiling and tried to demand the referee count her shoulders pinned there. Later he mocked the fan support messages on the wall while holding Lulu in a headlock and ripped some down to stuff into her mouth. He gained a fall on her at one point by wrapping her up in the ChocoPro banner and slamming everyone in arms reach on her.
Even in the face of overwhelming odd against a much bigger and stronger opponent Lulu was determined to do all she could, and fought with an edge she’d never shown before. Some of it admittedly backfired, as when she got a table involved and it led to Chris suplexing her onto it to get the first fall.
But other things like using her full body weight to reverse Chris’ whip outside to send him instead into the metal shutters, then dropping them on his arm (!!), did major damage and worked more in her favor.
Chris had taunted Lulu in the past by taking pencils from her trademark pencil-shaped case and snapping them in half. The first time he tried it here Lulu looked right at him and said “you can’t break me!” while picking up one of the pencils and snapping it in half herself, then stabbing Chris in the knee with the pieces.
Later when she grabbed the other case Chris took it from her, only to find out Lulu had planned far ahead and that one was full of powder. Lulu hit it into Chris’ face, nearly gaining a fall with the subsequent submission she was able to lock in.
Lulu got on Chris’ nerves so much Masa had to intervene at one point to pull Chris off of her as Chris rained forearms down on Lulu as she was flat on the mat.
With time running down Chris lifted Lulu with a double underhook but couldn’t complete the move due to the damage Lulu had done to his arm. She transitioned into an octopus stretch and seemed to finally have Chris in trouble. He powered out however, and in standing position with Lulu across his back he swung her around presumably going for some sort of slam to put her down for good. Lulu continued swinging all the way back around behind Chris into a beautiful 120% schoolboy rollup… FOR 3! With 8 SECONDS left in the match, Lulu Pencil handed Chris Brookes his first lost pinfall in ChocoPro, ever.
And remembering everything they went through she had refused to give up, not even once, throughout the full 30 minutes.
A stunned Chris confirmed that he didn’t kick out in time with Masa as Emi Pencil and referee Mei Suruga tended to Lulu (who had taken a hard bump on the back of her head off a shotgun dropkick right before the end when her head cleared the mat and hit the wood floor). Chris won the match 3 falls to 1, but the one was really all it took. Lulu beat Chris, in the only way that truly mattered.
An exhausted, emotionally spent Lulu crawled over to Chris, who gently cradled his adversary and held the ice to her head. She had finally proven him wrong. She belonged. As much as anyone else. She always had, but now Chris knew it too.
“I’m a prowrestler.”
“Yes you are Lulu. Yes you are.”
Required viewing:
ChocoPro 82: Pencil Army (Lulu, Emi, & Mino) vs Best Bros & Yuna
ChocoPro 95: Chris & Chie vs Lulu & Fujita
ChocoPro 100 Day 1: Pencil Army (Chris & Lulu) debut, Sakura & Fujita Tag Title Match
ChocoPro 106: Pencil Army (Chris & Lulu) vs Melt Brain Dancing
ChocoPro 110: Full Pencil Army vs Best Bros & Egg Tart
ChocoPro 115: Emi Pencil vs Chris Brookes
ChocoPro 120: Pencil Army vs Chris, Yuna, & Asuka
ChocoTalk with Chris Brookes
ChocoPro 137: 30 Minute Ironman – Lulu Pencil vs Chris Brookes
Supplemental viewing:
ChocoPro 72: Minoru Fujita vs Lulu Pencil
ChocoPro 77: Lulu & Fujita vs Best Bros
ChocoPro 78: Emi Sakura vs Minoru Fujita
ChocoPro 99: Fujita & Sakura vs Best Bros
ChocoPro 135: Lulu vs Masa
While Lulu’s been on the winning side of a few tag matches with her partner securing the fall, neither Pencil Army nor Lulu herself have ever won a match. But Lulu’s done so much more than that.
Besides, “Lulu Pencil, Emi Pencil, Mino Pencil, Chris Pencil … and YOU” all know it’s only a matter of time. Time, pride, strength, and heart. And the freelance writer turned pro-wrestler has them all in spades.
The nature of Lulu’s journey will undoubtably drastically change again as she’s following Emi Sakura to the US. But as always her Pencil Army will support her every step of the way.
Everything ChocoPro is doing goes up for free on Gatoh Move’s YouTube channel under Sakura’s “No Pay Wall” initiative, so if you do enjoy and are able / would like to support please see their patreon, join as a member of their YouTube channel, and/or donate directly via their PayPal. Also check out their international merchandise store!
Derailments of Thought 